Perfection in a Basket Full of Clothes

I know I have been writing a lot today. Maybe its because I feel like I have a lot to say and don't feel like a lot of people are listening. Most of what I have to say isn't particularly important and frankly I don't really need to waste time having people listen, but on here you can read or not its your choice and its nice to get things off my chest sometimes.

I like order. I like clean. I like lists. I like knowing what to expect, and when to expect it. Now I am not some neat Nazi who can only function if everything is in its place directly lined up and organized. I am no Monk, that is for sure. In fact there are times where I thrive in chaos, with a whirlwind of debris around me. But if I had my way I would choose to have order, as long as someone else was in charge of keeping it that way.

Today as I sat there looking at my laundry basket full of clean, perfectly folded laundry (if you don't know I am borderline neurotic about the way my laundry is folded) I realized how much I appreciate organization and order. I liked looking at my perfectly creased shirts, and my paired socks and my tri-folded towels aligned perfectly. There is little in my life I can control. Little I have the ability to perfectly place in the order I want it, but I can with my laundry. I can make it perfect and I find myself appreciating this power.

I think there may be somethings in my life that I am choosing not to face, not to deal with because I cannot control them. I cannot control who helps clean my home and who helps keep it clean when it has been cleaned. I can't control the homework and papers and exams that are being thrown at me. I can't control the economy. I can't control other people or their emotions. But I can control my laundry and for tonight I will live through my laundry. I will live among the flawless order of the pants, I will rest my eyes in the crisp lines of the shirts and I will allow my angst to melt away in the symmetrical tower of towels.

By the way I made a really tasty Lemon stuffed chicken tonight. It was yum.

Pictures of My Garden

Tomatoes and Cantaloupe Basil and Chives

Tomato Furrows Strawberries

Seedlings Lavender

Self Sufficiency

So I read a small mention in another blog about self sufficiency. Meaning being able to support your self and your household without outside help. Mostly in reference to food. I really liked the idea, perhaps since I have spent alot of time working on planting a garden the last few months.
When I lived in the country with my parents we had an orchard full of fruit but no vegetable garden. But for some reason when I moved to Fresno, I decided early that I wanted to have a garden for fruits and vegetables. My house came complete with six different types of mature and juvenile fruit trees. I have an Apricot tree, Plum tree, Peach, Nectarine, Oranges, and Apples. I thought if I had a complete vegetable garden I would be great.

Then I decided I wanted Chickens, unfortunately due to the city of Fresno I cannot raise any type of livestock in my back yard. I guess I can just buy eggs and chicken. But basically I have this really comprehensive garden growing in my back yard. I have green squash, yellow squash, watermelon, cantaloupe, tomatoes, okra, bush beans, carrots, white onions, garlic, green onions, red bell pepper, green bell pepper, strawberries, black berries, raspberries, red grapes, pumpkins, corn and a whole assortment of herbs including, dill, cilantro, marjoram, basil, chives, parsley, rosemary and lavender. We decided not to plant lettuce since its cheap and our celery did not sprout, so that's about all the veggies we will have to buy. And since we have planted way way more fruit and veggies than we can possibly consume, we are going to learn how to make and bottle our own spaghetti sauce, and jams.

I am really excited about the fruits of our labor. I want to be self sufficient. I want to bake my own bread, grow my own food. I am so excited for the possibilities.

Creative Fiction Writing Assignment

This is a rough version of my creative writing assignment. It's actually only the first few pages of a book I am in the process of slowly writing, but once again really really rough.


Whitney squeezed her eyes tightly closed. She was old enough to know that just because she couldn’t see the horror that awaited her, didn’t mean that it wouldn’t be there. Whitney clutched the sheets tightly over her head, hoping that what ever had made that screeching noise wouldn’t notice her hiding under her blankets. Her breaths came in short, shallow gasps and she willed her pounding heart to slow down. She was afraid the thundering beat of her heart would give away her vulnerable hiding place. She wanted to call out knowing her sisters were in the room next to hers, but she didn’t want them to make fun of her if the noise turned out to be something harmless. She willed herself to find the courage and peek over the edge of the blanket to peer into the darkness and investigate further the source of the noise. Just as she pulled the blanket down about to check the room the screeching noise returned louder than before. Without thinking she screamed.

The sound of her scream reverberated through the house. Simultaneously five sets of feet came running to her rescue. Her mom got there first and the light flashed on flooding the room in its flourescent glow. "What is it Whitney? Are you okay?" Her mom rushed to her side, and began examining her for wounds.

"I heard something horrible." Whitney stuttered, "There was a loud screeching, I think it was a monster trying to get in my bedroom."

Her twin sisters Karlie and Lindsey stared at her with bleary eyes and said in unison, "Not again." Lindsey went on, "You do this all the time, you’re such a chicken."

Karlie chimed in and clucked like a chicken. "Bet your glad you decided to sleep on the couch, Annie, Whit’s scream probably would have shattered your ear drums." Annie just looked on in fascination, at the scene unfolding before her. Ever since she could remember tales had been told of Whitney’s fears and her nightly routine, but this was her first chance to witness it close hand. Annie was from out of town, and rarely got a chance to visit her cousins by herself. Most of the time her parents came too and they stayed in the Motel down the street.

Whitney’s face turned red with embarrassment as she realized that she had over reacted yet again. The screeching was an owl perched in the branches of the elm tree next to her window. "Sorry Mom, I didn’t mean to wake you." Whit whispered.

"That’s enough. Everyone back to bed." Kay said ushering the still teasing twins from the room.

"Do you mind if I sit with Whit for awhile Aunt Kay?" Annie asked.

"That’s fine, just don’t stay up to long we have a long trip ahead of us tomorrow and you’ll need your rest." Kay said patting Annie’s messy hair. It was time for the family camping trip up above Dinkey Creek. Every summer as far back as the girls could remember the Grider clan caravanned the five hours north into the Sierra Nevadas for a week long camping trip filled with hikes, swimming, fishing and scary stories around the camp fire. Each family had their own campsite, but this year Annie’s family couldn’t make it. It took months of begging and cajoling but finally Annie had convinced her parents and her Aunt Kay to let her tag along with the Thompson family so she wouldn’t miss her favorite vacation.

Annie silently sat next to Whit on the bed, "Are you okay Cousin?" she quietly questioned. "I’m so stupid Annie, I hate it when I do that but I can’t seem to help myself. I’m such a chicken." Whitney spoke dejectedly.

"Ah come on Whit, its no so bad."

"Easy for you to say, when is the last time you woke up your entire house screaming over something so stupid?" Whitney questioned angrily.

"That doesn’t matter, I’m older than you." Annie said jokingly.

" Thirteen stupid days, like that makes you so much older than me." Whitney sarcastically replied.

"Older and Wiser." Annie laughed. The two of them laughed together as Whitney gently slugged Annie’s shoulder. "Ow punk, that could have hurt me."

"Want me to kiss it and make it better?"

"No, I don’t want your cooties." The two traded light hearted insults for a few minutes before Annie gently asked her cousin, "Do you want me to sleep in here tonight that way if you get scared you won’t have to scream?" Without answering Whitney pulled back the covers and motioned for Annie to climb under the covers.

The two laughed and giggled until they noticed the first rays of the new day glistening over the hills. "So much for that rest your mom told us we would need today."

"Like you ever listen Annie, you always do your own thing."

"Maybe that explains why I spend more time in trouble than out of it these days." Annie sprung out of bed with more energy than the few short hours of sleep she got would warrant. "Come on lets go the sooner we’re on the road the sooner we’ll be in Dinkey Creek. I can’t wait for s’mores and scary stories around the camp fire." Annie exclaimed excitedly.

"Scary stories are the worst part of the whole week." Whitney groaned slowly swinging her legs over the edge of the bed and onto the cool hard wood floor of her bedroom. Annie bounced from the room obviously excited about the day ahead of her. The five hour drive was always fun with her three cousins and Aunt Kay along for the ride. Sometimes Aunt Kay even let them steer, even though Annie and Whitney were only fourteen and Karlie and Lindsey only 12. Not to mention, Aunt Kay let the girls listen to music, and sometimes even from a CD or station of their choice. Annie’s dad always listened to talk radio on long drives and everyone had to be quiet during the drive. But it was never like that with Aunt Kay. Aunt Kay cranked the music up loud and laughed and played games with the girls making the drive seem so much shorter than its really was.

Annie rushed to shower and get dressed. She was ready to go long before anyone else was. Since Aunt Kay had insisted the car be packed before the girls fell asleep the night before there was little to be done in the morning. Unable to contain herself Annie skipped down the hall and knocked on the twins door. "Are you awake? Come on lets go." She opened the door gently and found both of her cousins fast asleep in their beds. She wandered back to her other cousins room dejectedly. "I’m ready to go but we’re the only ones awake. This is so not cool." she complained as she sat on the edge of the bed.

"I know how to get those two lazy bums out of bed." Whitney said grinning mischievously. She quickly ran to the kitchen and grabbed two glasses of ice cold water. "You’re not going to."

"Oh yes I am. Teach those two to tease me when I’m scared." Whitney tiptoed silently into the twins bed room and climbed the edge of the bunk beds so she could reach both Karlie and Lindsey. Annie followed her into the room silently and tried to stifle a giggle. Annie only had one little brother, John. He was nine years younger than her, so she felt more like an only child a lot of the time. Annie felt like she missed out on a lot of the interaction between siblings, and times like this made her happy that she only had little John to worry about.

Whitney tipped the glasses simultaneously allowing the frigid water to spill from the glasses hitting both of her sisters square in the face. Both of the twins screamed out in surprise, bolting upright. "What happened?" Lindsey screamed looking around for the source of the icy cold water. Spotting the empty glasses in Whitney’s hands and the smile on her face, Lindsey’s eye lite up with malice as it registered on her face what Whitney had done.

"Teach you to tease me, huh?" Whitney laughed as she exited the room at top speed. Annie barely had time to move out of the way without injury.

"I’m gonna kill you." Lindsey growled through her teeth as she took chase, Karlie close on her heels. The twins looking like drenched rats, full of vengeful rage. Their eyes almost glowed red and the anger rolled off of them in tangible waves of heat. Two on one is never a fair chase but Whitney had tricks of her own.

The sound of bare feet slapping the hard wood floor echoed off the walls, amplifying the intense mood in the house. Whitney was faster than the twins and laughed heartily as she sprinted through hallways and over furniture, always managing to stay a few steps in front of the reaching grasps of her livid sisters. Awakened by the pounding footfalls of her three daughters, Aunt Kay stumbled out of her room sleepily. "What in the world is going on here?" Whitney knew her best chance for safety was reach her mother before her sisters did. The chase was over and it became a race to their mother. Karlie managed to place herself in front of her mother between Whitney and her safe haven. But Whitney’s years on the volley ball team had taught her much about diving and sliding on the hard wood floors. Whitney ran as fast as she could towards Karlie and just as it seemed inevitable there was going to be a terrible collision she dove head first to the floor, landing with a thud. The slippery floor was well polished and sliding was easy, the water dripped on it by the sopping twins only helped propel Whitney through her sisters legs and straight into her sleepy mother, bringing her toppling down to the floor too.

Annie stood back in shock and amazement, having not uttered a single word since Whitney had awakened her sisters moments earlier. As the house became hushed waiting for a response from the felled head of the house, the four girls grimaced waiting for the onslaught of angry words and punishments sure to follow such an early morning disaster. The four girls quickly formulated apologies in their heads but before they were able to spit them out, Aunt Kay began laughing. The girls looked at each other shocked, unsure of how they should react to this unexpected turn of events. Timid laughter fell flatly from the girls lips, the kind of laughter one has when they are more scared than amused but their emotions betray them. "I can see I am going to have my hands full for the next week with the four of you." Aunt Kay said smiling. "I’d like to tell you things like this never happen in my house Annie but truth be told it happens about weekly. Though the home plate slide into me is new." She laughed again after that comment and the four girls finally joined in realizing that they had avoided trouble this time. "Well since we all seem to be awake, we might as well get breakfast and hit the road." She said still smiling. " You two dry off and get dressed." She said to the twins, "And, you two grab some towels and clean up the mess the girls made." motioning to the two older girls. Aunt Kay turned and walked back into her room closing the door behind her.

"Don’t think this is over Whitney. We’ll get you when you least expect it." Karlie snarled at her sister.

"Man you three are lucky. I can’t believe your mom didn’t kill us." Annie laughed nervously still, almost expecting her Aunt to come back into the hallway and cancel their much anticipated vacation to Dinkey Creek. Whitney grabbed a couple of towels from the linen closet at the end of the hall and tossed one of them at Annie hitting her square in face. "Hey," Annie complained.

"You heard my mom, we better get on it before she finishes getting dressed and sees the rest of the mess we made, and realizes maybe she’s mad after all."

The two girls traced the path of the chase wiping up stray droplets of water and righting furniture that had been knocked over, all the time laughing and recounting details of the eventful morning. "I can’t believe you dove between Karlie’s leg like that and knocked your mom down and didn’t even get in trouble." Annie said in awe.

"That was an awesome dive, I’m just that cool. But I’m surprised I didn’t get in trouble too." Whitney said, "She must have something on her mind."

"Was your mom kidding when she said you guys did this weekly?" Annie questioned. "Nah. They’re always chasing me, but not always cause I dump water on them. Sometimes I slug one of them, or eat their dessert or just about anything that makes them mad." Whitney explained.

" You guys are nuts. Do they ever catch you?" Annie questioned.

"Sometimes, then it becomes a real fight, but I always make sure mom is close by so it doesn’t get too far out of hand. Last week Lindsey gave me a bloody nose and a few weeks before that I gave Karlie a black eye."

"Like I said you’re all crazy, just like the rest of the Grider family. I am so so so excited for this weekend."

"Girls its time to go." Aunt Kay yelled down the hallway snapping Annie and Whitney out of their daydream. "March." Annie jumped up ad excitedly made her way into the garage, climbing quickly into the front seat. Annie suffered from motion sickness and the nausea induced by riding in the back seat would have lasted for over a day. She sat there bouncing excitedly in her seat waiting for the others.

In the house Whitney finished sticking the last of her fashion magazines in her bag and slowly made her way into the living room, checking quietly to make sure she wouldn’t be alone with her sisters, their threat still ringing in her ears. Whitney tip-toed almost silently into the living room, and quickly made her way into the garage, taking the seat right behind her mother for protection. With a few more threats and a few jabs everyone made it into the car, ready for the fun week ahead of them.

" Buckle up girls," Aunt Kay trilled, slowing backing out of the garage. "Dinkey Creek, here we come."

The Trials of Being A "Home Owner"

So latley it seems I have been experiencing all the negatives of being a home owner. So first a few weeks ago while mowing the lawn, one of our room mates ran over the sprinkler main, sending a geyer of water 20 feet in the air and soaking us and everything else. We run out there, trying to block the geyser, while Kory tries desperately to shut off the main water valve to the house, and our other room mate takes pictures. Finally after getting completly soaked we got everything turned off and were able to inspect the damage. Of course it wasn't anything we could repair easily. The mower had completly sheared off the valve and we would have to unscrew it so we could replace it. And of course it was the middle pipe between two others making it really hard to use any tools in the hole, and we were all soaking in the dark and it was cold. So Kory, Courtney and me were all outside freezing and banging up our hands doing our best to get this damn piece out of the ground. While our other room mate makes cookies. Then we get it off and head off to buy a new piece so we can have water to the house, but instead we get there like five minutes after all the hardware stores have closed. Leaving us without water until the next day, when our other room mates dad comes and fixes it while we sleep off our wet cold night.

Then the den got flooded due to a hole in the wall in a flower bed and our amateur gardener skills. That sucked, it still reeks a little and we have to constantly keep the windows open and the fans on. We used every towel in our house and many towels from friends and neighbors. Not to mention my mini-shop vac. Ahh once again we were all soaking, so was everything else but at least none of our electronics were damaged.

The next morning we woke up and found that one of the panes in our bathroom double paned windows was broken. We are still not sure exactly what happened but damn I guess when it rains it pours.

Spring is the Air

I have mixed feeling about spring. I love to hear the birds singing, see the flowers blooming, and there is nothing better than lying in the sun staring up at the most azure sky full of big fluffy white clouds. I even love the rain showers that occur just enough to dampen the earth and bring out that fresh just been cleaned smell. The other part of me, the one that can't breathe, has itchy eyes and raids the pharmacy department of any store any time to throw away vast sums of money, is not such a fan of spring. Every year it begins to warm up and my love for Spring overwhelms the logical half of me, and I rush outside to sniff the flowers to dazzle in natures beauty. Only to start sneezing unmercifully, and when I sneeze I involve my entire body, to the point where each sneeze is a painful reminder that I should stay inside and shovel Claritin like a hopped up crack addict. But then the sun shifts and I am forced yet again to go outside and relish in my good fortune to be alive, to be here and happy and to see days that could be no more beautiful.

After a few weeks of this intense war between my sinuses and the world around, both become too tired to fight and my body acclimates to the vast amounts of pollen littering the air, sneezing only occasional as to remind me of the half of month of bodily suffering I had to fight through just to be able to enjoy nature at its finest.